Shuttlecock

Theres something wonderful about pulling stumps out of the ground. I just need the rain to let up so I can figure out how do dispose of them. Now that theyre gone I need to level the playing field, plant some grass and get me a badminton set.

Boobs vs Explosions

We watched Inglorious Bastards (Watch it.) Friday night and I fell asleep by 1030. So we finished it up last night and I was able to stay up. At only 10 oclock, we flipped through the basic cable and came across Mean Girls. (Watch it.) It had just started so we started watching it. Midnight came around and just the right number of girls had been hit by buses. I didnt fall asleep. In fact Ill say I enjoyed it more than IB. Looks like this time boobs win.

Happy mothers day everyone!

It Dont Matter if Youre Black or White

Well, mostly it doesnt anyway. If you take the black male out of the equation, there isnt much difference between tipping of men women black or white. For some reason though black men hardly ever tip. Below youll find the average tip dollar amount and percent for 200 recent deliveries Ive made.

Black: $2.04 11.6%

White: $3.79 16.5%

Male $3.65 13.7%

Female: $3.40 17.0%

Black Male: $1.48 7.8%

White Male: $4.03 14.6%

Black Female: $2.32 13.5%

White Female: $3.64 17.8%

M11

Chris and The Easter Bunny

Every year, after the snow had melted, spring was in the air and the last candy heart had been eaten, the chicks harvested the fresh candy crops, packaged the candy in brightly colored eggs and delivered it to peoples houses.

One year a bad man named Chris came and ruined the Easter festivities that the chicks put on. (This is the same bad man that almost stole Christmas from Santa Clause several years earlier.) He would gather all the people together in giant buildings called churches where they would learn all about hope and salvation. The chicks tried to get to the peoples houses before they left but they were too slow.

Years went by and more and more people didnt care about the chicks or their candy. They all kept going to hear about what Chris did. Not sure what to do, the chicks went to see Santa and find out how he beat Chris. Santa told them of a wonderful company called Hallmark. The good people at Hallmark had given Santa all kinds of ideas like hiring a reindeer with a bright glowing nose and changing his name from Kris Kringle to Santa Clause. They would certainly be able to help the chicks.

After meeting with the people at Hallmark it was decided they needed someone who was fast and hip who could bring all the eggs to peoples houses before they left Easter morning. After searching and searching they found a bunny. He dressed in nothing but the coolest brightly colored vests and bow ties. Had amazing wicker baskets that had special pastel grass to keep the eggs safe. And he was quick. Much quicker then the chicks could ever be. He was able to get to everyones house before they woke up in the morning. Not only that but he was so fast that he even had time to hide the eggs in their houses.

Despite his best efforts, Chris was eventually forgotten. Giant chocolate statures of the bunny were built. Kids got to eat more candy then ever. And everyone had enough candy to make it to Mothers Day.

Chili

Ingredients

• Vegetable Oil
• 1 Sweet Onion, Diced
• 1 tablespoon Minced Garlic
• 1 pound Ground Beef
• 1 Green Bell Pepper, Diced
• 1 Red Bell Pepper, Diced
• 2 cans Stewed Tomatoes, Italian Recipe
• 1 can Tomato Paste
• 1 tablespoon Chili Powder
• 2 tablespoons Brown Sugar

Directions

1. In a large skillet, sauté onions in vegetable oil until translucent, add garlic for one minute, add ground beef until browned, drain.
2. In a 3 quart crock pot mix all ingredients and cook on low for 4 hours or until done.

Conference Round 10

Steelers over the Jets, Packers over the Bears.