I Kimmed (retro)

I thought you all might like to know what employees at your local pizza place have to deal with every now and then. The following is an actual phone call received by a manager. The manger will be in this color. The customer will be in this color. All names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Thank you for calling A Pizza Place, my name is Pizza Manager, how can I help you?
Hi, I'd like to order a pizza.
OK, can I have your phone number please?
555-6464
Alright, what can I get for you?
I would like a large thin half cheese half no mushroom pizza.
A half cheese half no mushroom?
Yes, half cheese half no mushroom.
O.K. so you just want cheese on the whole thing?
No. I want half cheese half no mushrooms.
I'm not sure what you mean by no mushrooms. Do you mean a supreme with no mushrooms or a veggie lover with no mushrooms?
Is that what I said? I want a half cheese half no mushrooms pizza.
Sir, you can't just have no mushrooms. You have to start with something in order to make it no mushrooms.
I.. want.. a.. half.. cheese.. half.. no.. mushrooms.. pizza..
Can you hold on a second please?
Sure.
The manager puts the customer on hold and turns to his cook and says:
Do you know how to make a large thin half cheese half no mushrooms pizza?
The cook looks at the manager dumbfounded and shakes his head. The manager picks the phone back up:
OK sir tell me one more time what you would like.
What I told you, a large thin half cheese half no mushroom pizza.
I'm really sorry sir but I don't know how to make that. You can't have no mushrooms as a topping it just doesn't work that way.
Why are you making this so difficult? Get me a manager.
I am the manager sir.
Screw you then.
The cus