Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Im Bringing Sexy Back

medium_smile.jpgI fixed a tire on a Corolla yesterday at work. Or so I thought. I wont bore you with the details, heres the gist of it. I fixed a leak, put the tire on, pulled the car out, the customer came to get the car, most of the air was out of the tire, pull the car back in and fixed it for real.

Needless to say, this customer was a little concerned that her tire was still going to go flat. Apparently, the day before she brought it to a different Sears and they "fixed" the tire, much like I did the first time. She was affraid that the tire was unrepairable. That shes was going to wake up in the morning and have no way to get to work. "What gauruntee do I have that this wont happen again?" she asks me. I explained why the tire wasnt repaired properly the first 2 times but that wasnt enough for her. She was worried and there wasnt much that was going to calm that.

Logic wasnt working so it was time to pull out a trick I havnt used in many many years. I said "I promise that your tire will not go flat tonight and youll be able to go to work tomorrow" and then gave her the smile that allows women to believe that there is no way that I could lie to them. Some of you know that smile. (Neil) I feel a little guilty using this ability on something as trivial as a flat tire, but I know she didnt lose any sleep over a flat tire last nig

6 comments:

teresa said...

no she won't lose sleep over the tire b/c she'll be too busy thinking about you and this "sexy" you brought on.

which will probably make her violently ill

Stemshul said...

It has been known to have that effect.

katohater said...

i'm troubled by the last line of this post: "...but I know she didn't lose any sleep over a flat tire last nig"

i'm gonna have to ask the judges for a ruling on this one, but i think it's racist.

and i would have told that bitch: "listen, bitch, there are no guarantees in life. none. so take your bitch-ass home and i promise you can masturbate to my face all night long if you must."

Traci B said...

I am still wondering where your pic is... especially in light of your being so overwhelmingly unforgettable.
Oh, by the way... what DOES make you so sure you fixed the damn tire this time?

paradroid said...

racist.

Stemshul said...

There are pictures of me all over this biotch. You just gotta know how to find them.

Long answer: The tire came in off the car in the trunk. I filled it with air and dunked it. There was a slight leak out of the bead so I put some bead sealer in it and sent it on its way. This was the only leak detectable while submurging the tire in water (bubbles will come out of the leak when you put the tire underwater there in allowing you to locate the hole) so I assumed it was fixed. With the customer came to pick up the car the tire had lost half its air. Apparently there was a second leak that was only detectable when the weight of the car was on the tire. (On very rare occasions a hole will only leak when opened by stretching or bending of the tire.) I found the leak by putting my hand over the tire and feeling for the air that was coming out then marked the hole with some tire chalk. (Not for childrans to play with btw.) I pulled the car in and filled the tire up with air and put a soapy solution on the hole and it made bubbles. I drilled a hole where the mark was, put a patch in it and put it back on the car. Applied the soapy solution again and not bubbles. This is what makes me so sure.

Short answer: Ive seen the smile in the mirror before. Anyone capable of that smile cant lie. Thats what makes me so sure.