Its Not Easy Being Green

Im a supporter of the low energy light bulbs. In fact, I support most things that conserve energy. Things like turning off lights in rooms youre not in. Turning the computer off while youre asleep or at work. Only using the AC 9 months out of the year. (You know, the months when it gets over 90 degrees.) Im all for most of the new fuel efficient technologies theyre putting in the cars these days too. I think anyone who does exclusively city driving and spends a significant amount of time in traffic should own a gas electric hybrid.

Why do I support conservation of energy? Its because I aint got no money to be payin all these bills. Sure its a nice side effect that the world and future of man kind benefits, but the green Im going for has a picture of Mr Franklin on it. The next car I buy for myself (Jaime gets the next next new car) is going to be a big old F250 super duty turbo diesel quad cab. But wait Dave, doesnt that thing guzzle gas? I read it only get 7-16 miles per gallon. Thats not good for the world or your wallet. Youre right. It does get lousy gas millage. And that would be a problem if I intended to pay for most of my fuel. But I dont. I intend to get most of it for free, and fat America is going to help provide it. The nice thing about a diesel engine is that it can run on vegetable oil. All you have to do is go to McDonalds and let them know youre going to empty their fryer waste bin, (which they usually pay to have taken away). You then filter the waste fryer grease, mix in some methanol and caustic soda and you have bio diesel for pennies on the dollar. The way is there, all it takes is a will.

Realistically I have no idea if Ill be getting that F250. Im not going to replace the Man Scorpion until Ive put at least 200,000 miles on it (which, at the rate were going will be in 9-10 years) or, God forbid, it gets totaled in an accident or suffers major engine or transmission failure. In 10 years the game could be completly different. Cars could have little fusion reactors that use water as fuel and only produce Hydrogen and Oxygen as byproducts. But if things are remotely similar to how they are today, youll be looking for the ketchup when you smell my french fry scented exhaust as I roll by.

Good Girls Go to Heaven, Bad Girls Go Everywhere

Ive been looking around the blogs the last couple days and have a few questions.

Ted:
Whats going on with Marcy? Shes not your best friend on MySpace anymore. And as long as were on the topic of MySpace friends, how come Im not in your top friends? I know we dont see each other very often anymore but come on. I was looking through your pictures and with the exception of yourself, I am the in more pictures then anyone else.

Apryl:
Thank you for posting again. I was really getting sick of looking at that ugly girl.

Nisi:
Werent you one of the people a few months ago that got all uppity about people saying how in love they are with their significant other on their blogs and how it just means that theyre really having problems? Yes you were, I just cant prove it because I dont remember where it was.

Neil:
Keep up the good work not posting. You havent pissed me off in months.

Matt:
More pictures please.

You Look Like A Rabbit

My kids will not be allowed in the bathroom while im taking a bubble bath.

I want a knife that cuts fingers off, as deminstrated by the door to door knife salesman.

Cheri, its not your fault, or Neils, that you dont have a penis. Youll have to accept that your father will never love you as much as your brothers. Stop taking all your anger out of Neil.

My tooth hurts.

What is Apple TV?

Does Averil Lavigne have a real band or are they just studio musicians?

It was sunny and hot today.

I hate pink eye.

I need new shoes.

Who Do You Love, When You Come Undone

I was watching the Deal or No Deal last night. This woman was on and she was down to 4 cases with the $500,000, $75,000, $25 and $10 left. The offer was about $121,000. Her husband, who is stationed in Fallujah, was on the TV there via satellite. She asks him if she should take it or pick another case. He says to call it quits and take the deal. She starts getting all cutesy whiney (you mans know what Im talking about) and asks if she can open one more case. Finally he tells her its her decision. So she decides to open another one. Then she asks him which case she should open. He tells her to open #12. She didnt like that so she decided to open #11. Well guess what was in #11. $500,000, you guessed it. This brought the offer down to $28,000. I say, the bitch deserved it.

Now I am certainly not saying that women should obey their husbands and do everything that they are told. I wouldnt have married my wife if I though that way. I think women should do what they want. What upsets me about this is that she asked him his opinion and then completely disregarded it, twice. If you dont want his opinion, DONT ASK FOR IT. This is why I hate (and Im guessing most men hate) going with my wife when she buys cloths. Shell ask me which color I like better or which pants I like better or all kinds of other opinion questions. Ill tell her and shell pick the other one. I caught on to this years ago (Im a smart one) so now I either tell her I like both, dont like either or tell her I like the one that I dont like. Ive even told her that I do this and she still picks the one I "dont like".

What Im trying to say in all this is, if youre not going to listen

Im Perfectly Willing To Home School The Child

I may be the only one who noticed this, and Im almost certain Im the only one who cares, but some of you blogging newbies are neglecting to align your text with the tops of the images. What the hell am I talking about you ask. Look here, here and here. Youll notice that the images are higher than the first line of text. Here, here and here however they line up beautifully. (Do everyone a favor and never look to this blog for formating advice.)

This isnt youre fault of course. Its a flaw in Blogger. When you upload the image it automatically puts a line break in after it. In order to fix this all you have to do is delete it. If you write your post in the Edit Html field then after uploading the image delete any spaces between the beginning of your text and the end of the anchor tag. If you use the Compose field then just delete the spaces between the text and image.

Another thing that you might want to do every couple weeks or so is republish your entire blog. This updates all the indexes on old posts. To do this click on the "Posting" tab and click Status then Republish Entire blog.

O ke doke, Ive gotten that off my chest now. Just for good measure... Shedubeard has sex with boys.